Starting a new life

Hi everyone,

I know this is a long shot but it is worth it.

I'm a 33 year old woman who was born and raised in Belgium. I come from a typical Belgian family. I have a sister and a brother. When i was 3 i met my best friend at kindergarten. We were in the same class en clicked immediately. The years to come we became inseparable. When she was eleven she lived with my family for a little while because her parents could not provide her with what she needed. She was placed with our family by the government. I did not understand what was going on on such a young age but it is the least to say that she needed to be taken away from her parents. After a few months she was placed in a foster family. The years passed by and i slowly started to notice her behavior changing. I always felt like she was happy with her new family. There was almost no contact with her real father and zero with her mother. We took our first trip together in the summer when we were 16. It was a beach holiday to Italy. There for the first time she told me that she had the feeling she should be happier in life, that she really wanted to but can't seem to do. I told her that I tought it was normal at our age and I did not really think much of it. The entire holiday she told me how happy she was in Italy. How life seemed slower. Every year again we would make a trip to Italy together. But I also saw that every year she became more down. By this time she already saw a lot people who tried to help her and she started a variety of medications. When she was 19 she got kicked out because her foster family could not take on the care of somebody who had this kind of depression. There were good moments, sometimes she felt good enough to work a couple of months but mostly she would end up in a downwords spiral and lose the job. At 22 I moved in to my own apartment and I took her in. There was nobody to help her. Her dad that she stayed in touch with had rebuild his life with a new family and had no desire whatsoever to help. I took care of her as much as my life would allow me. I had a career that I really loved and she was genuinely happy for me. But she struggled so hard with her mental health. One night she tells me that she is done and that she does not know how to move on. After a lot of talking we got to the decision that she would be hospitalized. She stayed there for over a year and I saw her light up. But when she got home she always lost her spark. This has been going on for the last years. The have been trough everything together and she really is just my sister now. The only thing that never changed are the trips we take to Italy. I believe her now when she says that time moves slower in Italy. And I love to see her when she is calm and content. Last year when she came back from her last time being hospitalized we spent 5 months in Italy. I still work at the same place as I did 10 years ago. They know my story and they knew it was important for me to take a vacation so long. Whenever we go she is already excited when we land and she sees the stores in the airport. To her Italy is just magic. This time we went to a tiny village first and there was nothing but rest and the sea. She loved it there and she asked me why we never moved here. But at the end of our trip she also told me that she really thought she had lived her life and she is tired of fighting. At the end of last year she told me she started the euthanasia procedure. Her condition has reached a point where traditional therapy an medication could do so much. And how much this hurts me i am also very calm. She was by my side in everything I have been trough. I tried to help her every way possible but I also fully understand her decision. We have been talking about dates an funerals as if it is normal. I love her more than I could ever describe here and I would love to make her last months on earth so very special. I can take a gap year at work and besides me and my family she doesn't have anybody else. We are leaving this November for a few days to the south of Italy and I would really like to surprise her with the news that we can stay there for a few months.. I want to go to all the places we have visited together. The trip I planned would take 9 months and she wil be home by the end of next year.

On the other side she still is an amazing woman who has no shame and really does try to give everything she has. I'm making a website/blog where everybody that donated can follow our journey. And maybe we can meet some of the people who donate while we are in Italy. I know this is a huge amount of money. I calculated the money I need and put in some of my savings. I will share a list of what we spend on the blog.

I think it is really important that i mention that this is not just two girls who want a holiday or that I'm using mental health to get money. This I really important to me and I just want to be with her for these last months in the placed she loves most.